Portland, Tennessee Blog

I`m 11 & I don`t like MySpace.

Coconuts kill around 150 people worldwide each year, which makes them
about ten times more dangerous than sharks,” says Brent Escott, managing
director of Club Direct. “People may worry about being bitten by sharks
when visiting Australia, but I would suggest that we would be better
advised not to sit under coconut trees.”

Can't find info on how many die for using Myspace each year but this was interesting. There are lots of dangers out there and Myspace is just one of thousands. How many of you have been on Vacation where there are Coconut tree's and told your kids not to stand under them?

Michelle - I agree, the story

"a teacher whose child had been abducted and taken out of the country (to Korea) by the child's biological father. Months had passed when she recieved a tip on her MY SPACE site. After locating her son, she flew to Korea, went to his school, got her son and sought refuge in the US Embassy. Mother and son are now both back in the US. HOW COOL!"

was wonderful and there have been quite a few great stories that have come out of myspace.

seriously DO NOT say shark attacks are on rise because sharks are slowly becoming endangered, don't believe me then look up shark finning, look up something called the shark fin mafia in china and japan. millions of sharks are dieing every year and they do not have the kind of reproductive capabilities to recover from that. Talk to anyone who knows their stuff about sharks and whales, anyone who is a marine bioligist they WILL tell you that sharks are dieing at massive numbers because people are killing them for stupid reasons. Educate yourself about them instead of believing the hype you see on the news.

Listen to the song, you will see it has more to do with this topic than "sharks". LOL!! :~))

Sharks probably got on this topic the same way Brad Paisley did. :~)

The number of shark attacks increased from 63 in 2006 to 71 in 2007, continuing a gradual upswing during the past four years, said George Burgess, director of the university's International Shark Attack File.
***************************************
Don't know how sharks got into this topic, but sure deaths are low and so are deaths associated with myspace. Shark attacks are on the rise, so should parents not monitor where their kids swim, no panic in doing so after all we do care for the well being of our children don't we?

Anyone listen to Brad Paisley's song Online, Great Song!!

The people that wanna pick out a few claims about how bad myspace is because a few teens made bad decisions likely due to their parents not playing an active part in their lives is just like all the fuss and scare over shark attacks. We think they are dangerous cause we hear about it on the news but Sharks kill less people each year than Soda Pop machines do. Seriously it's like 5 or less a year. We think some things are soo awsome when someone dies from it (and yes it is tragic) but most of the time it's due to the new hype about the topic and people getting scared. The same kids that get picked up through myspace are the same ones that would likely be picked up at the mall or somewhere else I'm sorry to say.

In the last week, I have read two totally different stories about MY SPACE.

One was that a kid (a boy) shot and killed his father after the father grounded him from using MY SPACE. Personally, I think there was more to that story and that maybe there were other issues . . . but who knows.

The second story was about a teacher whose child had been abducted and taken out of the country (to Korea) by the child's biological father. Months had passed when she recieved a tip on her MY SPACE site. After locating her son, she flew to Korea, went to his school, got her son and sought refuge in the US Embassy. Mother and son are now both back in the US. HOW COOL!

There are two different scenarios here.
One being how "CD" believes is right to raise kids (kinda free willy) as he/she turned out ok,
and one where "SL" was raised and it wasn't a good experience, as he/she rebelled when set free!
These two have a lot in COMMON ;~).... like over doing, Thanks CD/SL for sharing your experience.
Look between the two and you'll find a happy medium with your children and more.

Happy Posting from a nosy ole bag! - LOL

Sounds like you had a horrible childhood and it is terribly unfortunate, but I don't think anyone here is suggesting that parents should completely isolate their kids or falsely accuse them of things they aren't doing.

And what do you consider being "nosy"? This term has been used several times now and I would really like for someone to give me some examples because I know in my heart that no one is suggesting that kids should be allowed to do whatever, whenever, with whoever without question?

My parent's wear nosey all the time and It always P'ed me off. I used to wish someone would kidnap me just so i could get away from my nosey parents. I didn't even care what happen to me. I wasn't doing anthing wrong like they where always thinking i was. It did teach me to pretend that i was happy alot and hide who i really was from them.

I couldn't even have friends over or go to stay with friends because my mother thought i would get i trouble. They controlled me alot as a kid but as soon as i left home I went wild. I became everything they were against.

I quess what I'm trying to say is there is such a thing as Over protection and my parent now know that.

Judy I forgot to mention, KUDOS to you for being a nosey old bag!!! Lol.

DC, I'm sorry but there were a couple of thing's that you said and I don't understand your way of thinking. First of all, you said your kid's "think like you". Then you turn around and say that Your myspace was a place for you to "be someone else" Those were your word's and just stop and think about it a minute. If you are pretending to be someone your not then what do you think you are teaching your children????? Do you not think that they may be doing the same???? Then you pretty much said that we were miserable people by trying to run our kid's life well I would rather be miserable and have my kid's safe...but I hate to burst your bubble but I am happily married and my children are very happy and they know that they are loved and that's why I check on them. They have their privacy when it comes to other thing's but I will alway's continue to monitor them when it comes to being online... I hope that you do not one day regret not checking on them when it comes to being online. I'm sure that these parent's that have lost their kid's due to them meeting up with stranger's online wish they had the chance to check on their kid's. My heart goes out to all of those parent's.

I think privacy is over-rated when it comes to kids. As long as I am providing food, shelter, clothing and otherwise supporting them, EVERYTHING is my business. Privacy will be their right when they venture out on their own and pay their own way.

Insofar as what I did when I was a kid . . . I am completely honest about mistakes I have made, but I also explain the consequences I suffered and that MY mistakes don't mean THEY get a free pass.

No one is perfect and we all do the best we know how to do and in the manner which is right for our own families. All I know for sure is that I have an extremely close and open relationship with all four of my teenagers and I am thankful for it. Somehow, I have managed to strike a good balance that has allowed me to keep very close tabs while still allowing them to have fun and yes, get into a little trouble every now and then.

Teenagers- the reason some species eat their young.

Bravo to all parents who feel monitoring their childs activity is appropriate remember one thing if your child does harm, damage, etc etc you as their parent are responsible and will pay the consequences in the end, their actions could cost you your home, life savings, or freedom depending on circumstance. Sure as kids we did kid things, but nothing like the troubles kids these days get into. We didn't have internet, cell phones, text messaging, & sexual predators on every corner, we could freely go blocks away from home or other places without worry, today is a whole different world and you need to WAKE UP! The problem isn't myspace it is the underage usage that isn't monitored properly. 12-15 year olds saying they are 17-20, sexual themes, pictures and surveys on their myspace pages, because their parents don't care or want to know what they are doing. That is not trust my friend! And monitoring is not being nosey!
DC
If your kids will push away because you monitor some of their activity then they are already doing things you would not aprove of that should be a red flag to any parent. Until they are of legal age they are your responsibility and should not control the hands that feed them.

I'll take a "nosey old bag" any day over a parent that has their heads in the clouds.

Wake up DC, better to be nosey than sorry!!! I'm sure you have probably taught your kids well BUT kids will be kids. If they know you are not "monitoring" them...well..............
Friends are a BIG influence on kids even when the kids know they shouldn't do something.

I was sitting in church yesterday waiting for service to start and I watched a mother ask her teenager for her cell phone so she could look at her Text Messages. To me this is not nosey but a caring mother watching out for her child. My daughter is the same way and I am proud of the way she raises my grandchildren.

No parent is able to control everything their children do especially a teenager but if you stay on top of the situations my monitoring computer time and cell phone and FRIENDS you are way ahead of the game. Kudos to ALL parents that do!!!

DC - I'll refer to comments you made earlier.

"If you raise your kids right they will turn out just fine."
"My kids read this and said to tell you they are glad I'm not a nosey old bag and all I could do is Laugh.
That's because they think like I do"

It looks like you taught them well, Good Luck!
PS: "Just remember that most kids are smarter than you might think."

Happy Posting from the nosey old bag... lol
Judy

Judy
My kids read this and said to tell you they are glad I'm not a nosey old bag and all I could do is Laugh. That's because they think like I do. I don't read their Myspace page's because I respect their privacy. My kids told me they don't talk to anyone they don't know. I beleive them because i tought them to trust me and I would trust them back. I'm not going to push my kids away trying to spy on them all the time.

I get on Myspace and Bulls--- like everyone else does. Thats because it is myspace to be someone else. I learned a long time ago people that are miserable are always trying to run someone else's life which makes that person miserable too. I'm loving life and I'm letting my kids enjoy their's.

I also never listen to the news because they try to prey on peoples fears. Yes predators can lure kids on myspace but they can also grab them walking or riding their bycycle down the street. They can also get them while playing at the park. The latest way is to become a teacher or priest. I decided to teach my kids and not to control them.

The problem isn't Myspace. The problem is kids not using any common sense and giving out personal information over the internet to strangers. Internet activities do need to be monitored when it comes to younger kids, but they also need to be schooled on how to use the internet and the do's and don'ts... I have a Myspace page. When a friend's daughter asked me to be her 'friend', I checked out her page- and was horrified to find that she had posted her full name, what street she lives on, where she works and what school she attends. Yeah, I ratted her out. Her mom had no clue. Some parents need to get more interested in what the kiddos are doing.

I don't think anyone is actually blaming myspace for anything, I know I wasn't. It may have came off like that, but that was not my intention's. Myspace is just a place for communication and that's great, all I was trying to say is check on your children when they are online. I'm not saying you don't, but these kid's are talking this way and if they really are doing the thing's that they say they are, something need's to be done. You can't tell me if your child at these ages was online talking about going out the Saturday before and got drunk or whatever that you would be okay with that. You also can't tell me that you would want your child hanging out with someone that parties like that. I agree, if you raise your children with values they have a better chance at turning out alright but noone can gaurentee that. You just have to hope and pray for the best. If the parent's of kid's that are online and telling everyone for the whole world to see that they are drinking and doing drugs if they could just see it for their own eye's, maybe they could help them now. This is just too young to be experimenting... And it's not just that, you never know who is hiding on the other side of the computer talking to your child. SG hit it right on when they said when used correctly and MONITORED by parent's , myspace is great.

It was just on the news the other day where a girl met a guy on MY Space and ended up dead. She went to meet him and he killed her.

Did anyone watch to "Catch a Predator" series than ran on NBC Dateline? The internet is a very dangerous place for children be it My Space or just a random chat room. There are people out there that will prey on your children so parents beware!!

It's hard to believe that some on here think My Space and others like it is no big deal. I hope it doesn't come back to haunt you some day.

Judy,
My kids are 12, 14, and 17. We all have myspace pages and have for years. They are a basic form of communication these days, just like email, cell phones and texting. They (and us) use them to communicate with family and friends all over the country. What Michelle posted was very witty and that's just all it is. I do not see that they will 'become' something or someone from merely having a myspace page. They all are also involved in many activites and myspace is just a portion of an everyday communication.

DC and MDL - Two questions

1-What age are your children
2-What experiences have you had with MySpace

Michelle - LOL exactly!!

Kids get to live a life that may not necessarily be them on myspace, the problem is they eventually become that person in many ways.

I found this on MY SPACE. I don't condone the behavior it enlists, but I don't think the author was doing anything other than trying to be witty. And I think they were very successful.

RULES FOR TEENAGERS

1. Thou shalt not sneak out when parents are sleeping. (Why wait?)

2. Thou shalt not do drugs. (Alcohol lasts longer)

3. Thou shalt not steel from K-Mart. (WalMart has a bigger selection)

4. Thou shalt not get arrested for vandalism. (Destruction has a bigger effect)

5. Thou shalt not steal from thy parents. (Every one knows grandma has more money)

6. Thou shalt not get into fights. (Just start them)

7. Thou shalt not skip class. (Just take the whole day off)

8. Thou shalt not strip in class. (Hooters pays more)

9. Thou shalt not think about having sex. (As Nike says - Just Do It)

10. Thou shalt not help old ladies cross the street. (Just leave them in the middle)

Note to MY children: Just because I think it's funny doesn't mean that I won't punish you SEVERELY if I catch you doing any of these things.

I agree with DC, raise them right and they are smarter than you think. You can't blame myspace for this, that's the same misconception that guns are bad and they kill people. No, it's the people that do........

After reading the following comment's I have to say this. I was their age back in the 80's and the kids I went to school with were into the same things back then if not worse stuff. We all turned out alright. If we wanted to do something we figured out how to do it. If you raise your kids right they will turn out just fine. Getting into a little trouble is all a part of growing up.

Just remember that most kids are smarter than you might think.

Thank you Judy, I just can't believe that 12,13,and 14 yr. old kid's are doing this. I don't want to blame the parent's for everything and I'm not saying it's their fault, but I just can't believe they let their kid's online and never check to see what they are doing. Especially after what all you hear. Times have changed and we as parent's need to realize this.. Bye all...

B.R.
GREAT post! I couldn't agree more, you wouldn't believe how many kids in Portland have my spaces and oh my, the trash talk, smokin, swearin, vulgar, obnoxious comments and, some of their names would just give you the willies. My granddaughter had a friend over last weekend and I'm in computer room with 2 computers, I noticed the friends on MYspace, I said we don't go there in this house so move on to something else or you will have to get off the puter. We thought she was a nice girl, well, go back to puter and to history, I pull up her myspace............. OMG What in the world is wrong with some of these kids these days!

I am a mother of 2 plus a 14 yr old stepson. I myself have a myspace account and so does my step son and my daughter. My daughter know's that I am #1 on her friend's list, I check her page at least once a day and most of the time I check it right after she get's off. I have explained to her why I do this and she seem's fine with it b/c I am honest with her about the danger's. I try to give them privacy with other thing's except when it comes to being online. Now my stepson on the other hand, he's a good kid and he does not live with us. About a month ago, I was online and I went to check his myspace page, oh my golly, you would not believe the stuff that was on it. All that was on it was kid's and I mean kid's talking about drinking and smoking, and I don't mean cigarettes either. My heart stopped and I freaked out. I waited on my husband to get home and showed it to him and he in turn called his ex and of course she claimed she didn't know it was on there, although 2 day's earlier she had left him a comment on myspace... anyway that's a whole other story, I now have his password and check his daily and I had to make him delete about 20 friend's of his that yes lives here in Portland and goes to the middle school. I am sorry to keep going on and on, but my point is PLEASE check your child's myspace page daily. These kid's are in our neighborhood and have probably been to our homes and they are talking about smoking and drinking and I can't get into the other stuff on here. The kid's that I personally knew, I called their parent's and asked them to check thier child's myspace page and I called about 7 of them and 3 of them told me that it was their page and their privacy and they didn't want to spy on their kid's... I completely understand that, but what are they going to do one night when they let their child go out and they don't come back. I'm sorry to have rambled on, but if you don't check on your kid's, you'll never know when they are in trouble and if it comes to my kid's being mad at me, so be it if it protect's them.

My Granddaughter (14) also HAD a my space, set to private same as SG noted, we (her mother and I) monitored it daily. Made sure all her friends were people she knew, etc. etc. etc, if any of them commented or sent messages that were vulgar they were deleted from her friends. Alls well and good, she goes to NY last summer to visit her dad, she had left her cell phone laying around while unattended it rings, the aunt answers it and it is some guy, aunt pretends to be my granddaughter, come to find out he is 28 Y.O. and lives in NY wanting to try to hook up with GD while she was there, he got her cell phone # from a friend of my GD's My Space where this friend had posted it in her blog/comment,!!! They had been talking/blogging about her trip to NY on the friends my space which evidentally wasn't set to private and the friend couldn't of cared less who her friends were, think last we saw she had 160+. To make a long story short don't know what happened as her dad did notify NY police, but she NO longer has a myspace.

My teenager does have a myspace. It is set to private which means she has to invite someone in to be allowed to communicate with her or someone has to ask permission to be her friend. No one can see her pics or email her without permission. I monitor her account each and every day and she is fully aware. I do the same with my children and their text messages. They are not allowed to delete them. We have not had any problems with myspace and I think it is great as long as it is used correctly and parents monitor what their children are doing.